The Silence Part II

Later, she found herself on a bench in the crowded city. As the people passed her by, she listened to them. So many of them had to tell nice stories and told they would miss their friends. Laura sat there and thought about her own stories. One time, when she was a child, she and her best friend were playing in the park, when they suddenly kicked a ball that hit a young man. They both ran away as fast as they could. Afterwards, they both laughed and couldn’t stop. Another time, they made jokes about their teacher, when they realised he was standing right behind them, they too laughed and even when they went to detention, they were still laughing.

Laura realised now, that when you’re getting older, you can’t do such things anymore. You always have to be serious and do the right things… Things like Coffee or sleep, which you wouldn’t like as a child are now the one things that you need and miss the most. The older you get, the more you think about what happened and you start to see yourself through those eyes you had when you once were a child.

The Silence Part I

"Tell me a piece of your history that you're proud to call your own.Speak in words you picked up as you walked through life alone.We used to swim in your stories and be pulled down by their tide, choking on the words and drowning with no air in sight"

- Bastille - The Silence

The warm sunlight on her cheeks woke Laura up. There she was, another day she had no motivation to get up and start in the day. The comfort of her bed, her love for sleep and the silence. These things were all she really enjoyed at this moment. But now, she needed to get up and do those things she tried to avoid. She didn't want to talk to him, the one who cheated on her with this cheap girl last week. She felt nothing else than pain and she was tired. Tired of the way how people lie and cheat. The way how she always had to fight for the things she wanted. It never happened to her that she got something for free. Her parents died when she was a little girl and didn't not know that this world was cold and hard. Since that day, she had to fight. Those silent little a moments like now, did never last long.

Finally, with heavy bones, she got up and walked out of her Bedroom. She went down the floor to make herself a coffee. She looked at her phone to see if anybody was looking for her. She saw that her ex-boyfriend tried to call her for several times. Without a second thought, she decided to ignore him. How could he dare to call her after he did that to her? But there was another message. Her best-friend wrote her in the middle of the night. Apparently, she was out with her other friends and asked Laura if she would join them. Laura didn't text back, first she wanted to drink her hot coffee. As always, she drank her coffee without milk or sugar. The weather outside was beautiful. Everywhere you could hear the laughter of children and even the birds seemed to be happy.

Laura drank her coffee, got up and walked back in her bedroom. There she looked for her Outfit for this wonderful Day, and dressed herself up. In the Bathroom, she washed the dried tears off her face. Her eyes were red and everybody could see, that she had spent a lot of time crying. 

Behind blue eyes

Heart's still beating

"Heart still beating but it's not working, it's like a million dollar phone that you just can't ring. I reach out trying to love but I feel nothing, my heart is numb"

- OneRepublic- Feel Again

Childhood Thoughts

"I owned every second that this world could give, I saw so many places, the things that I did. With every broken bone, I swear I lived"

OneRepublic- I lived

When I was a kid, I used to believe that our heart is formed like the hearts we draw. I imagined that the little candle is under it and every time my heart got to hot, it would jump straight up and fall down, when it got cold. That's what i thought how our heartbeat works. Today, I really like this thought even though it's just stupid. I really enjjoy how children see the world with their naive point of view.

I used to believe that God and every person that died, would sit on his own cloud and watch over us. I couldn't believe, that when you die, there is nothing. When our cat died, I imagined that he would wait on his cloud until I would come back to him, so we could both be together again.

Storytime: Beauty

"So sweet, so beautiful. Everyday like a queen on her throne"

The last time he saw her face, was for a kind moment in the train. She sat in front of him with her headphones on, smiling to the music she was listening to. It seemed, that nothing could worry her and she didn't feel the weight of the world on her shoulders. Her beautiful smile, the light in her eyes and the way she looked, everything looked so perfect to him. How could such a pretty woman live in this dark world, full of terror and pain? He never saw something like that. "Is she an angel?" he asked himself. 

He was afraid of speaking with her. How could such a beautiful woman like she was talk with a loser like him? But if he didn't take this chance, he would surely regret it for a long time. Just as he wanted to talk to her, she stood up, smiled at him and walked out of the train.

And he? he couldn't believe it. He missed his chance, perhaps they would meet again but then it could already be too late...

Black and White

A Sunny Day

"I does what I wish to. If you're mad well to bad. Sounds like a personal issue."


Storytime: Nightmoves

"Movies and News on television. Sometimes it's hard hart to tell the differences. When real life's more fucked up than fiction."

She stands in the darkness, The only light in the streets come from the lantern on the streets. Alone, with Camera she walks through the city. Some People pass by, but none of them seems to have the courage to speak with her. The cold wind and the wet streets make her feel like she's all alone and cold. How could such a Beauty like her come to thoughts like these? What could have happened to her young soul that makes her feel like this. Was it a man? her family?

As she walked down the dark streets, she suddenly starte to laugh and all her darker thoughts seemed to dissapear. One glance later, it was the same again. With her deep thoughts and this pain inside, she Walked around the corner and entered a small diner, where she ordered something to eat. She sat down, took off her Jacket and waited. She looked at her Phone, but there was no message or even a call for her. Sad and with tears in her eyes, she placed it in front of her and prayed for a small message. Just someone who would think about her or was wondering what she was doing.